Well, what a few years we have had! We have been up and down but despite everything we have come out of the other side so much stronger.

When we first met, I didn’t think you having bipolar was anything that I needed to worry about… turns out though, that when I fell in love with you it was the only thing I worried about. How would I look after you? How would I keep you safe? Every part of my being wanted to keep you from the heartbreak and hurt that you had experienced before we met and all of it was because of Bipolar, and the thought of me not being strong enough to protect you terrified me.

We know that it’s something we can never change in our lives, and if it wasn’t for your illness as well as mine we never would have met. Even though life before us was hard, it was worth every second of pain. My life before you was empty, cold and nothing but loneliness, then I met you and I saw light for the first time in my life. That is when my life began, and I have been cheated out of the 25 years before you. I wish that at the end of our lives I could get those 25 wasted years back just to spend another lifetime with you (but it’s ok, because then we will be otters)

So the questions still stand, how will I look after you? with every fibre of my being, with every penny I have and with every ounce of love I have to give, I will be your voice when you don’t want to waste your time defending yourself. How will I keep you safe? In the home we have built together with every last bit of strength I have in my body, until my last breath.

I will be there picking up every last piece, for the thousandth time you let those who you trust hurt you. I will be the idiot that jumps around the room with you when you are excited, or cry with you when you are sad, I will also be the person that will carry you when you don’t have the energy to walk anymore, and calm you when your thoughts are going to fast.

When you need to scream and shout, I will be there to listen, when you need to laugh I will laugh with you. When you are scared I will be there to hold your hand and when you need a cuddle I will be there with my arms outstretched waiting.

We both know that you do not need me to be your saviour or your defender, but I will be regardless because I want to be able to let you grow and heal without you having to worry about everybody else and what they say or think, I will be your defender to enable you to come back fighting and stronger than ever.

Only yours always,

Sops